The 17 Things You Should Know About America

I feel like I use the word interesting too much. I need for find some more words. Luckily Word has a built-in thesaurus. Today was a fascinating day. But fascinating overstates today I think. Interesting is the best word in this situation. Today was an interesting day. Ishy, my counselor, asked me to help him after school instead of going to track. As today was the hardest track practice of the week I was happy to oblige. It’s funny how runners avoid running. Soccer players seek out games; I don’t know of any basketball player who complains about playing basketball. But runners, myself included, constantly whine about workouts. It’s a love hate relationship. But I digress. Today’s post is not about running; it’s about what happened after school with Ishy. Ishy is an English teacher, the school counselor, and the home stay coordinator at my school. He’s a busy man. Eishin, my school, is sending kids to California for a three-week exchange at the end of this month. He wanted me to help them practice their English conversation skills.

There are 19 kids going on the trip. Ishy broke them up into groups of three and four and then I would spend three minutes with each group talking. They’ve been working on speaking English very hard for the last few weeks. I was surprised at how much they understood. I didn’t slow down for them. Ishy told me to speak normally. Then we discussed cultural differences and things to keep in mind when traveling to America. This was fascinating to me. I’m perfectly aware of the hundreds of differences between the U.S. and Japan and I learn more every day. But seeing it from a Japanese point of view was a novel experience. He typed up a list of 16 things to keep in mind when in the States, in English of course. We added one to the end. This is probably the most concise description of Japanese culture I can think of. I like the list so much I took a copy home with me. So here it is, the 17 things my Japanese teacher wants Japanese students to know when they go to the U.S.

1. Instead of bowing, Americans shake hands when greeting each other or meeting someone for the first time.

2. Americans use their first name among friends. If you are speaking to an adult, address them as Mr. Family Name or Ms. Family Name. If you don’t know their family name, use their first name.

3. In Japan, many people will tell an acquaintance to “Please come and see me” even though we don not really mean it. If you say this to Americans, they will take you literally and may really come to see you.

4. In Japan, when introducing yourself to someone, a person will give the name of his school or company where he is working. Americans often just introduce themselves by their first name only.

5. Physical contact shows friendship. It is very normal for Americans to hug each other and pat each other on the back. Many will give each other a kiss on the cheek when they greet each other.

6. In the States, when a group goes to a restaurant, it is normal for everyone to order something different.

7. Americans will stand up for their rights and give their opinion if they disagree.

8. In the States, a wife always goes out to a party with her husband.

9. In the States, when entertaining guests, a husband is just as expected to serve and cook as his wife is. The wife will be equally involved in the conversation.

10. In the States, silence is especially uncomfortable, so you had better talk as mush as you can.

11. It is natural in the States that they look each other in the eyes when they talk as a sign of respect. If you look away, it indicates to the other person that you are trying to hide something from them and hence are not sincere, or that you do not care about what they are talking to you.

12. Saying, “excuse me”, “sorry”, “thank you”, and “please” are very important in the States.

13. Japanese people will often belittle their gifts. Americans are proud of what they bought for you and they will not try to hit it. They often say, “I hope you like it”, “I’m sure you will fit it useful” or “when I say this gift I thought it was perfect for you.” The receive will thank the giver and compliment the gift, but will not apologize to the giver.

14. Smoking is not allowed in most public places in the States. Especially in California, there is no smoking inside buildings.

15. Americans will often say “see you later” instead of “good-bye” even though they may not see you ever again.

16. Table manners are very important.

17. Do not bring facemasks to America. If you wear one they will think you have a deadly disease and be scared or they will think that you are very strange.

This list probably raises a lot of questions. Feel free to ask. I burst out laughing when I read number 3. That is definitely my favorite one. I remember having that conversation with my first host mom shortly after I arrived. I was perplexed why anyone would say that and not mean it, but that it the nature of Japan. It can be hard to tell when people are being sincere. I love this list. It is a perfect summary of what I’ve learned here. Just brilliant.